I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
be right there i have to get my cape
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
