I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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