I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
