Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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