Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
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