all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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