How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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