So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
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