i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
