She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Sober January is a disaster.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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