shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
