Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
