You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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