I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
You took a bar mat shot.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
