At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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