What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize
