Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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