Slut skills are useful in every country.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
