He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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