i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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