hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
