Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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