I am in a vortex of obligation.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
