My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
