Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
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