i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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