do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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