Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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