We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Green mimosas i think yes
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
