Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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