that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
