Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
