She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
