Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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