Fine. I'll sleep in my office
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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