Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Randomize