if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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