Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize