your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize