Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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