so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
