Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize