with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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