In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize