Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Randomize
