yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
