he shaved USA in his pubs
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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