Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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