You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
