god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
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